Effort Praise Sticks Longer
A longitudinal study out of Stanford found that toddlers praised for their effort — not their smarts — grew into five-year-olds who welcomed challenges instead of avoiding them. Praising the process, not the outcome, teaches kids to trust their own persistence. "Good job" fades fast. "You kept trying" becomes part of how they see themselves.
Try this
Name the Process, Not the Prize
Next time your child finishes something, try swapping "good job" for "you stuck with that" or "you figured that out yourself." It's a small edit, but it points them back to what they actually did.
Let Them Name It First
Before you jump in with any praise, try asking "how do you feel about that?" and see what they say. So the real question is whether the words work best coming from you — or from them.
When your child finishes something they worked hard on, what comes out of your mouth first?
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