Same Home, Different Childhoods
Siblings raised in the same house often carry different emotional memories of it. Researchers studying non-shared environment find that a large share of a child's development comes from experiences siblings don't share -- including how each one perceived and remembered their parents. Same house, different childhoods -- because each kid met a slightly different version of you.
Try this
Ask About Their Version
Ask each kid to share one memory of an ordinary Tuesday. If the stories don't match, that's not anyone getting it wrong -- it's two relationships with the same parent, formed at two different moments.
Notice Which You Showed Up
Some families find it helps to recall who they were during each child's early years -- steadier, more stretched thin, more distracted. Not a confession, just context.
So when your kids compare notes, whose version feels closest to the parent you were trying to be?
Whose version of you feels closest to the parent you were trying to be?
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